A Good Week So Far. . .

All quiet on the MoJo front. It was a tumultuous weekend (although I still don't know why my blog posted all of my Friday-Sunday posts on Sunday -- have your blogs ever done that to you?), but things seem to be settling down. Mo has been home early! all week! I, for one, am finding my inner sunshine is glowing brighter, simply knowing that I will soon be on my way home. I've made a list of all the little projects that need doing before we list our house. I am counting weeks (just weeks!) until my mom and stepdad arrive to celebrate Thanksgiving, then a few more weeks until I get to see my sister and A. All in all, things are looking up.

The thing about me is, once I make a decision, that's it. It may take me a LONG time to get there, but when I'm determined, nothing can stand in my way. So saying those words, "I've decided," was like a huge weight being lifted off of me. I'm a planner by nature, so to feel as though I'm moving forward, instead of spinning my wheels, feels so much better.

I've got two scenarios in my head, which I'm sure doesn't really surprise any of you. Only time will tell which one comes to pass. Either way, a year from now I plan on being home, with the "real-life" support of my family and friends around me. It's so refreshing to KNOW something, as much as one can know anything. My mantra of "what if" has been replaced by "no matter what," and that simple change means everything.

"What if we can't have kids?" becomes "No matter what, I'm going to be around my family."

"What if my marriage falls apart?" becomes "No matter what, I'm going to be okay."

"What if my dreams never come to fruition?" becomes "No matter what, I'll find a way."

It's almost as if I've been paralyzed by indecision, and finally making one has unleashed an inner power that I forgot that I had.

And, damn if that doesn't feel good.