3...2...1...

Three. More. Days. 

That's all I've got. Three more days until I can either breathe a sigh of relief (for now, anyway) or.....let's not even discuss  the alternative. 

Today was a bit better. I managed to keep myself distracted for most of the day. I ran some errands, worked on some stuff for school, cleaned the kitchen. Anything really to keep me from thinking too much about things I cannot control. 

Thank you for all of your supportive comments. I feel whiny and ungrateful when I express my anxiety, but getting all of my fears out in the open really seems to help.  As does going back and re-reading some of my posts from Pregnancy #2. (It's amazing what you can forget in three years.) Turns out I did have some ominous hints of what was to come -- there was spotting, and even some bleeding, that I had somehow  blocked completely from my memories. I've had none of that yet (knock on wood!) and that gives me some hope. 

I keep telling myself that THIS pregnancy is different. That we are doing / have done everything we can to give this embryo the best shot possible. That THIS time, I'm going to make it through the first trimester and, eventually, bring my baby home. 

And for a few brief snippets of time, I almost believe it.