I'm home.
The weekend in a nutshell: Mo behaved badly, we fought, and ended up driving home separately. I spent most of the time we were there in the hotel room, by myself, waiting for him to come to his senses. He did eventually, but UGH.
I've told him, in no uncertain terms, that that was my LAST trip back to our old hometown. I can't take him in that environment, making those same choices, for whatever reasons. I know he's grieving. In the last two years he's lost his father, both of his uncles, his grandfather, and our two babies. He's angry, I get that. But he's been doing so well in our new town, away from old influences and heartbreaking memories. I believe he can continue to do well here. And if he chooses to return -- well, I just won't be there to see it. (I know that to my new readers I may seem vague, but I try to respect Mo's privacy as much as possible here. It's hard to blog about marital problems without jeopardizing that. . . and yet it's something I need to get off my chest, too. If you want the history here, check out my archives, particularly from last spring/summer. You can read between the lines and get a fairly accurate picture. Just keep in mind that it's just one person's perspective, and it can be emotionally skewed at times. End lecture.)
Monday, July 26, 2010
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Well, I am not a type 2 diabetic, but I am a (well-controlled) type 1 diabetic. It hit me at age 21 (I am now 33), so at least I have the blessing of not having had to deal with it as a child. I am well aware of what a blessing that is.
ReplyDeleteDiabetes is no cake walk, but among life's continuum of "bad things that can happen," it is definitely not the worst. The important thing is to figure out what works for you, and STICK WITH IT! Nobody knows your body better than you do, and I have found myself at times telling my doctors the best way to proceed.
Twelve years, 1.65 kids later (latest due in late October/early November), I still consider diabetes to be a "minor setback" in life. Even with the constant monitoring, shots, etc.
As a former nurse, I have known many people with type 2 diabetes who have lived long, relatively healthy lives. A big part of this particular disease is managing it through proper diet and exercise. So long as your mother does that, there is no reason why your mother's life expectancy should be greatly impacted for the worse by diabetes.
ReplyDeleteSure, we all know the horror stories of people for whom the disease progressed and caused painful complications and early death--my own grandmother died at 74 from complications of type 2 diabetes after nearly three years on dialysis--but we hear less about the success stories. They're out there.
Oh I'm so sorry for your rough weekend.
ReplyDeleteHoping things get better fast!
~Happy ICLW~
I'm sorry for the rough weekend! I really hope that things start to look up soon. ((hugs))
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry that your weekend was so hard, i am glad that you are setting limits with your husband though that you can live with. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteAs far as Diabetes, my father and paternal grandfather have/had it. My father was diagnosed about 14 yrs ago and is managing his illness with medication, he still needs to watch his diet and lose weight but has limited side effects from the condition. My grandfather was diagnosed in his late 40's and died at age 84. He did have some leg pain as time went by, but managed to live a mostly normal life for a man whith this illness for nearly 40 yrs. my best advise is to see if your mom would work with a nutritionist who can help her make the necessary life style and diet changes. Hope this helps
I am a long time lurker, dropping a line to tell you my dad has had diabetes for 20 years (he's 56 now)and he's been in good health. He was diet and oral med controlled up until about 2 years ago when he started insulin. He's doing really well on that. He does very well with his diet, but needs to work harder at the exercise. My best wishes to your mom, and to you as well!
ReplyDeleteMy husband's aunt is has type 2 and is one of the most healthy people I know. She is in her early seventies and goes and does with the best of them. If fact, she accompanied us to Disney two years ago and she walked and rode and had a ton of fun. She was always having to stop and wait for us to catch up to her. So all that to say, she is living well with type 2.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for the rough weekend. I interview people about their medical h/x in my line of work, and it seems many people are able to control it very well. I have Insulin Resistance myself and don't want it myself!
ReplyDeleteMy great aunt had type 2 and died in her early 80s from unrelated cancer. My maternal grandmother has been living with it in basic good health since her 50s although she did have a bout with glaucoma, she did mostly recover from that. She is alive and of average health for a woman in her 70s. I agree with the egd comment above. I think it can make a huge difference how one takes care of themselves after a diagnosis. I know it's scary, my mom has health problem as well. But I hope some of these comments make you feel a little bit better.
ReplyDeleteMy dad has it and my FIL has it. My dad has done a good job of controlling it with diet and excercise. My FIL not so much he hasn't taken it as serious as he should he likes his sweets and fried foods to much. When your mom comes to visit make meals that are healthy, go on a walk, help her live a healthier life anyway you can.
ReplyDeleteI only wish your weekend could have been better. You definitely need to put your foot down that you aren't going back to your old hometown as you've come to the realization it isn't good for you. Hang in there! Can't wait to hear your "ray of sunshine" tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteIf it makes you feel any better my nan has it and she is well on her way to 80. I think keeping active and watching you sugar and carb intake is the key here. But theres a fine line between a healthy diet and one that makes you miserable! Happy people live longer.
ReplyDeleteI do hope your mom's is controllable. Hugs!
2ctt
I work in the medical field and have worked with several type 2 diabetics...its all about how you take care of yourself....My hubbies mom just got dx a couple of weeks ago...was put on Metformin to control her glucose and also told to lose weight...she had been taking her meds and has already lost 14lbs...and her numbers are going down...so if your mom stays on top of it she will be just fine:) Sorry about the bad weekend...Sucks when you have one of those makes the following week seem so much longer
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry the weekend was such a bust. I really hope things get better.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that you had a crappy weekend. I think it's very common for people to get old habits when they go back to the old town. I know my hubs does this a lot, and it's almost worse because everytime we go back there, he has to "fit everyone in" and he just goes out every single night!
ReplyDeleteI hope this upcoming week is better for you and Mo. Also, I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I don't have much helpful information, but I know there's a lot she can do to manage it. Hang in there!
All of this puts serious stress on marriages...add the regular stress of life and it is SO DAMN HARD. Hang tough lady.
ReplyDeleteAs for the Diabetes, my step-dad has had it for ages, as has my grandmother. He's lost some toes, but mostly out of his own negligence. She is fine. It's manageable :)
Happy ICLW! Kakunaa (#78)
Blech. I'm so sorry that you had a bad weekend. How is your mom doing with all of this? Keep us posted, please.
ReplyDeleteMy grandmother had type 2 for a long, long time. I was young and don't remember much of it but she lived a long and healthy life.
Sorry about your bad weekend. ((Hugs))
ReplyDeleteMy husband's father has had type 2 for almost 10 years and he's still the same person he always was, just with a few daily pokes and shots.
Sorry that your weekend wasn't awesome.
ReplyDeleteI hope your mom can manage her diabetes well - my mom's friend was diagnosed over 12 years ago, and has done very well. She completely changed her lifestyle and I think she might even be off meds now.
So sorry that you and Mo had a bad weekend. Me and my hubby haven't been through near what you two have and it is still hard for us. I hope things get better this week for the both of you.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your 2nd comment about the diabetes. I know lots of diabetic people as I work in healthcare also. It seems that diet and exercise go a LONG way in helping control this disease. Knowlege is key. Hopefully your mom will learn as much as she can about diabetes and own it, never letting it get her down!
I'm sorry the weekend was tough in so many ways. Hoping everything returns to an even keel soon.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry the weekend was awful. Hopefully neither of you will have to go back there again.
ReplyDeleteMy Grandmama had type 2 diabetes, exercised and ate healthily, and lived until she was 80 (she died of something else entirely). Best wishes to your mother, and a hug for you, because parental health problems = AIGH!