The Stats

IVF#3

15 eggs retrieved

13 mature

11 fertilized via ICSI

6 made it to blast (holy shit!!!) 

2 transferred

4 frozen 

Transfer was smooth as could be, and I loved the way Dr. Expert told me as he finished, "You are now 2 1/2 weeks pregnant. On (beta day), you will be four weeks pregnant." That positivity, that thisisgoingtowork mentality, is exactly what I needed to hear. I don't know how much positive thinking really influences the outcome at all, but I am resigned to the fact that I cannot prepare enough for this NOT to work. I will be crushed, no doubts about it.  And so I am going to enjoy it in the meantime, as much as I can. And right now, with nothing but hope and possibilities before us, that's easy. I am brimming with optimism and the SIX freaking blasts we got out of this cycle. I am under no illusions that my positivity will waver, but for now I am the most relaxed and confident I've been in a long time. I'm taking it easy, enjoying Mo's pampering and extra puppy snuggles. 

My sister put together a goody-bag for me with small gifts for each day from transfer to beta. Something to remind me that I'm not in this alone, to lift my spirits and keep me distracted. Which is beyond awesome, and makes me smile every time I look at it. I open each gift with great ceremony, and look forward to the next day's surprise. This feels good, and I am in no hurry for it to end. And so I've (mostly) stayed away from Google, and far from those wretched pee-sticks.  They can't tell me what I want to know anyway, which is whether or not my beautiful blastocysts are snuggling in for the long haul. Only Time will tell me that, and she's not in any particular hurry, it seems. 

And so we wait. 

And we hope. 

Again.